Inspiration from this Episode

“And you’re going to say, I got to think about this a little bit. And both of you are going to take some time to get your heart rate down so that your brain can think.”

“I’m going to begin to understand that this has lots of layers for them in terms of how they think other people see them.”

“Give grace and say it’s okay and we use our adjustment coping skills to not hold a grudge or be harsh with punishment or discipline.”

079 | Us & Kids: A+ for Application

Intro 

Today, I'm glad you joined us because were tying together the last three podcast about upgrading your marriage so that it will last forever, while you also become more awesome parents taking care of your kids together.

We’ve talked about the D, defining your desires, and values. Then we moved on to two other podcasts that talked about the core communication skills we need for living out those values and ways...

Inspiration from this Episode

“And in those connections, we become more aware that the emotional self that we bring to the relationship.” 

“You see when we need to protect someone we believe in them. We are looking at helping them out in building them up.” 

“It gives grace when we have to have some benefit of the doubt.”

078 | Us & Kids: Necessary for Your Core - Part 2

Intro  

Today we are talking about the last three of the eight core or necessary pieces that we know to make the DNA in our marriage and our family life really strong and healthy. You and I both know our marriages are very unique. And even how our marriage was five years ago and how it is now also can be very different and looks very different. 

It's important that we know how to keep those values together. Not every marriage, or person in the marriage has the same values but learning how to value what our spouse values and vice versa...

Inspiration from this Episode

“Those connections through kind words and kind actions matter for the rest of what happens in our relationship DNA.”

“And that means that you know how to listen carefully and you know how to keep your own self under control so that you can continue to connect with those that are listening.”

“If you want to give all of that a little boost use some touch, hold hands, sit by each other, use hugs.”

077 | Us & Kids: Necessary Core Strengths

Intro 

Last week we looked at the values that we bring into our relationship and how those values build up the basic structure of our relationships with our kids or even with our spouses. So today we’re going to look a little bit more at the particulars that hold this structure together. 

This structure is in the particulars were going to talk about are important for your marriage and for any age kiddo that is sitting next to you. So this applies all...

Inspiration from this Episode

“Then they can bring our actions and our words and our attitudes all in line to help us achieve our goals.”

“We had to work to compare those values because they influence our desires in our vision for a marriage and a family.”

“We just had to shave some rough edges off in order to create shared values that we honored.”

076 | Us & Kids: Best Marriage Ever

Intro 

In today’s show, we are focusing on building up the skills we need for helping our marriages and our families regardless of the messiness of life. Today we are going to talk about DNA and we are looking at DNA within your relationships, your marriage, and your family because that too is always going to be unique just to you and so we can’t make a course or a program that is going to be one size fits all.

This week we are diving into the D strand specifically and while the D strand could stand for a lot of different things, we...

Inspiration from this Episode

“Shame is our most powerful master emotion - meaning it has a lot of power and it’s a master over the other emotions.” 

“You could though be a very honorable and integral part of the functioning of those things.”

“They will feel comfortable with you and be able to calm down and take responsibility for their actions.”

075 | Us & Kids: Shame, Responsibility and Honor

Intro  

On today’s show, we are diving into shame and responsibility and it’s going to apply both to you as a husband or wife, and how you interact with your kiddos. We’re going to start by talking about yourself because so much of our parenting and interactions in our marriage can come from a place of shame and that can be somewhat contagious.  

The podcast today will help you understand where shame sneaks into your heart and mind...and how it sneaks into kiddos’ being as well. And...

Inspiration from this Episode

“When the stress is high, often kisses go bye-bye.”

“And when it builds up inside of us, our brain becomes anxious and can’t think well.”

“As you change your self talk, your internal thoughts can move to become more positive.”

074 | Us & Kids: KISSes & Stress

Intro 

On today’s show, we are wrapping up the last part of a 5 part series we started in January about how to stay married forever while you parent together - not one or the other. Today we are talking about KISSes. Of course, there has to be kisses! Eskimo and butterfly kisses, as well as I love you - oooh! kisses. 

But when there is stress and headaches, so much and too much! Who even remembers to kiss? And, does it really matter if we kiss? Really? Well, if you can take care of this kind of KISS, then the other kisses are so much better and sweeter!

What You’ll Learn in Today’s Episode

• How to...

Inspiration from this Episode 

“It’s important to realize that in your tone and what your body is doing you’re sharing information.”

“Because just holding hands brought you connected even though you didn’t have a good solution.” 

“Pick the kinder interaction. Then move into kindness because that interaction matters.”

070 | Us & Kids: Intentions on Purpose

Intro  

On today’s show, we are starting out the year by talking about marriage. When we developed the Us and Kids format, platform, and later the DNA for Fun course, we wanted to really be able to encourage these two places in the same place. Because being married forever while you parent together is crucial to being married forever.  

We know based on studies that the fractures in a marriage come in the first 5 years of parenting, not the first 5 years of marriage. That is because in the first 5 years of parenting there...

Inspiration from this Episode

“Are you investing or how can you improve your investment in gold life skills for your kids?”

“You’re trying to be gracious to them but you also want them to feel safe and secure enough to be honest with you.”

“Learning how to do things together is another really good skill, and being compassionate.”

068 | Us & Kids: Gifts for Everyone

Intro 

On today’s show, we are talking about finding ways to end the year well. When we feel that in many ways this year has been bumpy, there have been anticipations and disappointment and adjustments that just seem nonstop. Sure there has been good, but there’s also been struggle and tension.

Last week we talked about anticipation and how the biblical wise men had to make changes and pivots and they were tired too but that they ended up in a really good spot. This week we are going to continue on with those wisemen and that biblical story -...

Inspiration from this Episode

“This power of hope for something better, or bigger than us - that relieves pain or brings joy is crucial to our daily lives - no matter how old we are.”

“Kids show up with energy and desires to be near you for comfort, strength and reassurance and growth. They want to follow and model you. 

“Making an impact on your spouse that brings strength, courage and connections that build memories about this year so that it ends in joy and peace.”

067 | Us & Kids: Anticipation and Hope

Intro  

Our podcast today comes from my thinking about anticipation and the 3 wise men. The story of the wise men comes from the Christian story of the birth of Jesus. But, do not worry if you think this is going to be a come to Jesus moment. This podcast is about the anticipation, disappointment and joy that the wisemen experienced.  

In some ways, they had a year like us. You see, they started out with...

Inspiration from this Episode 

“Look at your shelf with them to see what you can do to clean it up and to make it so there’s room to function.”

“The walls for us are really our framework or boundaries and there are times when those boundaries are sticky.”

“The emotions and thoughts you need can get stuck on somebody else’s attitude or your own attitude.”

062 | Us & Kids: What’s in Your Refrigerator?

Intro  

On today’s show, we’re going to talk about something that all of us have - our refrigerators. Ever think that it's time to clean your refrigerator? Every now and then, we might realize that our refrigerator has gathered a whole lot of crunchy dirt. 

And so as I think about refrigerators, I also realized that they have an awful lot in common with how we live our lives as a family and as a couple. So let's take a look inside your refrigerator and see what we find.

What...