Inspiration from this Episode
“Kids often also have to move when they're anxious because they don't have language to be able to say what's going on.”
“Plan that there is going to be anxiety and then plan so that you can manage it.”
“I'm going to look at my options and I'm going to choose the best one for the moment and for the long haul.”
086 | Us & Kids: Anxiety and Breathing
Intro
On today’s show, we’re going to talk about anxiety. Anxiety is often physiologically a sense of overwhelming concern, or worry. Because there doesn't seem to be a good way to resolve it and even if it's resolved, there's a worry about what about next time? So it's a worry about things in the future and the unknown things that we don't have control over.
Sometimes we don't know exactly what we are worried about. We can just feel that concern running around in our heads all the time. So, let’s talk about what to do with...
Inspiration from this Episode
“His takeaway from that experience was valid, as was mine, even though our takeaways were a little bit different.”
“What did we want to do if we were ever in such traumatic places again?”
“It’s okay to talk about it. It’s okay to feel it and to relive it and to wonder about it.”
081 | Us & Kids: A Trauma
Intro
On today’s show, we are going to talk about trauma. Not many of us like to think about it, but probably all of us have it. And trauma impacts families, it impacts marriages and impacts us as individuals. And yet I feel like it’s not very often talked about even though it often impacts how a family and a couple reacts and interacts with things.
Today we are going to talk mostly from the general perspective about trauma with a little bit of application more towards the end. You will hear some of the DNA process.
What You’ll Learn in...
Inspiration from this Episode
“It is a grief no one is anticipating. In the pregnancy process, we are anticipating life, not death.”
“It is really impacted in some ways by what our hopes and dreams and our plans were.”
“If you need to, be your own advocate. If you need another opinion, get another opinion.”
058 | Us & Kids: Pregnancy and Loss
Intro
On today’s show, we are talking about how to stay married forever and parent together even when you have experienced a miscarriage or early infant loss. It can be hard to keep a marriage together under such great emotional strain.
I interviewed Nancy Kingma, MA, LLP. She is an expert in my area who has worked in pregnancy loss and infant loss for over 40 years. We talk through the experiences no one ever wants to have happen so I asked a variety of questions and I will share today some of her responses.
What You’ll Learn in Today’s Episode
Inspiration from this Episode
“Because it's physical energy not mental. However, mental injury and stress is true and real.”
“As you continue to build this positive thought into your self thought and talk, death of lies will slowly be edged out.”
“As he stayed in the present no matter how much he felt, he began to understand that the present was the safest and most sane place to be.”
048 | Us & Kids: Goals, Depression and Real Life
Intro
On today’s show, we are talking about depression and how that affects our lives. Depression can make us feel really dead. Not like dead as in not alive, but dead alive but not able to engage in life. So our lungs can breathe and our heart can beat. But our brain can hardly think and our body can hardly move.
It's just not a fun place to be. No one wakes up in the morning thinking today I'll be depressed. It is heavy, and about it as impossible to stop as a car running over you. In...
Inspiration from this Episode
“Social distancing has made me lonely. Zoom calls, although better than nothing, don't cut it for me in the long haul.”
“Being connected to them, seeing them eye to eye, hearing their voices in automatic direct time and in the real same space.”
“Caring for my friends and about my friends and my family is natural human behavior and it's healthy.”
037 | Us & Kids: Angsty = Anger and Anxiety
Intro
On today’s show, we are doing things a bit differently. We aren’t going to focus on our marriage, nor are we going to talk about parenting much. What we are going to be diving into is us, and how that can inevitably affect our partner and kids.
It can be hard during this time to not get stuck in the spinning circle of that anxiety and then being angry for feeling anxious. We want to make sure that we manage our emotions and that our emotions aren’t managing us. When we are more...
Inspiration from this Episode
“He knew that the best thing he could do for me was listen, without many words.”
“How can I help you? And that question, may not have an answer, like I don't really have an answer for him, but it means I'm in it with you.”
“I understand you can't control everything and move forward based on what you can know and do as you move forward.”
036 | Us & Kids: Uncertainty Can Make us Crazy
Intro
On today’s show, let’s be certain about what we’re talking about - uncertainty. There is so much going on and changing everyday in our homes, our hearts and our relationships. We are told one thing and then what feels like almost instantly that answer changes.
Do we just have to sit and spin in circles because nothing's for sure? Or is there a way to keep ourselves calm and keep on track? When we take the time to understand that we can’t control everything, it helps us regain...
Inspiration from this Episode
“We do have an impact if we pay attention to the long game and say, this is what I'm deciding.”
“Do you want the mess to create higher anxiety or do you want it to create lower anxiety?”
“Remember to be grateful, to think positive and content thoughts.”
032 | Us & Kids: Dismiss Depression, Negative Nonsense and Anxiety
Intro
On today’s show, we are going to be keeping up with topics that are timely with everything going on. We are talking about what is happening in your home, with what is working or not working to keep those relationships together when we are all together so very much. It’s easy for strong overwhelming emotions to take over us during this time.
Some of our worries and our anxiety can be taken on by our partners and kiddos if we’re not careful. One of the best ways we can become more aware of our feelings and struggles is to write down, on paper, all the...
Inspiration from this Episode
“What's more dangerous for you when your heart is full of anxiety or when your heart is full of love?”
“It is a very, very powerful tool in terms of avoiding the blackness that anxiety can bring into a household”
“Maybe one of you thinks this is awesome and one of you thinks this is awful, but both are real for both of you.”
030 | Us & Kids: Falling in Love, Not into Anxiety
Intro
On today’s show, we are taking it back to the times and memories of when you and your partner first fell in love. What were those feelings like? What about them made your heart skip a beat? So many things in our lives can cause anxiety, especially with everything that is going on in the world right now.
If we take the time to reminisce on the things our partner did or the things about them we loved, those chemicals in our brain can help combat some of that anxiety. We might be trying to find a new normal right...
Inspiration from this Episode
“This nervous system is wired to look out for things that appear to be dangerous.”
“It begins with being aware that you are in control of your body.”
“Make a different plan that gives yourself a minute to think about it because anxiety is trying to protect you.”
025 | Us & Kids: Befriending Your Anxiety
Intro
On today’s show, we are talking about all things anxiety! How do we get it? How do we handle it? What do we do when we freeze and can hardly think? How does anxiety affect our kiddos and what does it look like in them?
Our bodies naturally work to protect us from danger. Although the dangers our bodies recognize now are a lot different than they used to be, our nervous system still kicks in to send out that adrenaline. With all that adrenaline pumping through our bodies, we can be left with overwhelming emotions and feelings.
What You’ll Learn in Today’s...
Inspiration from this Episode
“We don’t have much control when the sun shines, but we must take advantage of it when it’s there.”
“15 to 20 minutes outside can really give you a nice boost.”
“When we have that sense of camaraderie, we're not alone.”
020 | Us & Kids: Light to Feel Right
Intro
On today’s show, we're talking about something most people like to avoid talking about - depression. Depression can affect many of us for so many reasons and in so many different ways. The reason depression leaves us feeling a variety of different emotions from sluggish to sadness or even loneliness is because of the serotonin levels in our brain. Serotonin is a hormone that brings us happiness, pleasure and that upbeat feeling.
Many of us are also affected by Seasonal Affective Disorder or SAD due to the gloomy weather, lack of sunshine or grey skies we see a lot of in the winter. Yes, weather can impact...
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Not fluff, just encouraging and useful stuff.